1.2 Mastering Crucial Conversations: A Guide to Skilful Communication
- Joseph Sparks
- Apr 8, 2024
- 2 min read
In the previous post, we delved into the concept of Crucial Conversations and the importance of understanding and reducing lag time. Building on those insights, we now turn our attention to mastering these conversations. Drawing from the book 'Crucial Conversations', this post will explore the skills and techniques required for skilful communication within our roles as senior leaders in schools, with a particular focus on the concept of CPR (Content, Pattern, Relationship).
The Art of Skilful Communication
When it comes to Crucial Conversations, skilled individuals find a way to get all relevant information out into the open. It's not just about speaking; it's about listening, understanding, and creating a space where all voices can be heard.
Understanding CPR: Content, Pattern, Relationship
The concept of CPR is central to mastering Crucial Conversations. It helps us unbundle and unpack the various issues at play:
Content: What is the specific subject or issue at hand?
Pattern: Is there a recurring behaviour or trend that needs addressing?
Relationship: Are there underlying relationship concerns that are affecting the conversation?
By identifying whether the concerns are related to content, pattern, or relationship, we can choose the right topic and approach the conversation more effectively. For instance, if a senior leader needs to address a recurring issue of poor performance with a department head, they must determine if the problem is with the content of the work (e.g., lesson planning), a pattern of behaviour (e.g., constantly missing deadlines), or an underlying relationship issue (e.g., lack of trust or communication between team members).
Choosing the Right Topic
One of the first steps in mastering Crucial Conversations is choosing the right topic. 'Crucial Conversations' teaches us to be mindful of three signs that we might be having the wrong conversation:
Your emotions escalate.
You walk away sceptical.
You're in a déjà vu dialogue.
Recognising these signs helps us refocus and choose the right topic for the conversation, using CPR as a guide.
Key Actions for Leaders
Mastering Crucial Conversations requires intentional practice and application. Here are some key actions inspired by 'Crucial Conversations' that senior leaders can try:
Utilise CPR to Unbundle the Issues: Determine whether the concerns are related to content, pattern, or relationship. Focus on what's most relevant at the moment.
Choose the Right Topic: Ask yourself, "What do I really want?" Use CPR as a filter to choose the most relevant topic.
Simplify Your Concern: Condense your concern into a single sentence to maintain focus once the conversation gets underway.
Place a Bookmark: Another essential skill is placing a bookmark. This means making a conscious choice about what you want to talk about and registering clearly with the other person that you will return to the bookmarked issue later. It ensures that the conversation stays focused and that important topics are not lost or overlooked.
Conclusion
Mastering Crucial Conversations is a vital skill for senior leaders in schools. It's about more than just talking; it's about engaging in meaningful dialogue that fosters understanding, collaboration, and growth. By understanding the concept of CPR and how to choose the right topic, place bookmarks, and navigate the conversation skilfully, we can create a space where all voices are heard and respected.
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